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(X-rated) May 20, 2020:
I woke up in the middle of the night to Voodoo aimlessly wandering around my area whispering “Freyja”, then climbing into my one person tent once he found me. I could feel that he was happy I was in there, especially that I was alone.
He started feeling me up and I told him I was really sore from him ramming me with his cock numerous times throughout the day. It seemed he was trying to keep me satisfied so I wouldn’t go searching elsewhere and it appeared to be working.
He stuck his finger in my pussy and said, “Just the tip.”
Gladly, I gave it to him.
In the morning, I woke up with him beside me, both of us scrunched up at the edge of the tent. He told me last night he met a couple of people who saw us fucking by the river, so it was a triple voyeur experience.
“Mmmm,” I moaned.
We walked over to the main showers to find that the line was too long so we went to the next building over. The women’s line was too long there, so he told me to just join him in the men’s. I followed him in and started getting undressed, growing excited by every new guy that walked in and saw me. Voodoo tried covering up my exposed body with a towel several times so that the other guys wouldn’t see my breasts, but I so desperately wanted them to watch. It was really funny observing their reactions. They often apologized, grew confused, then assumed they were in the wrong bathroom and left.
After our shower, Voodoo and I walked to town and ran into Sidetracked along the way. We excitedly jumped into his lap as if he was our father and we were his kids. While doing so, we accidentally branded his neck with the fat joint he was smoking.
“Something to remember us by,” we flirted.
Then, we went to check out the vendors, ate some homemade cookies and bought some trippy looking mushroom fanny packs. I got to see Darwin again and brought up how I watched his latest videos and saw that he changed direction in his way of thinking/lifestyle.
Nonchalantly, he says, “Well, I’m sorry, or, you’re welcome, whichever way you took it.”
I said, “I just wanted to say I’m super happy you followed your passion and inspiration. I’m happy you listened to your guidance and I love to see where it took you.”
He showed me through his response how mature he was in his interactions with people. I was sure he received all sorts of backlash due to having a big following, but just witnessing the way he would take on the responsibility for other peoples’ emotions showed me a healthy response for how I wanted to interact with people. It wasn’t even the words he said, but the energy behind it.
The hiker parade was starting soon, so Voodoo and I went back to the tent so he could tie me up in ropes. I was looking forward to getting walked on a leash at Trail Days for months prior. Initially, Professor was going to be my candidate, however he met a lady whom he grew really fond of, so plans apparently changed.
Voodoo was all for it, up until the moment he wrapped me up and it was time to get going. He got freaked out by all the people and said it appeared to look quite ‘scandalous’. To me, I felt in my element. Actually, I would have felt more comfortable being completely naked.
The moment we got to the bridge, there were what appeared to be thousands of people and we would have had to walk past everyone. I actually peed myself from laughing so hard when Voodoo tried to cover me up with his body.
Still, we walked, found our class of hikers and joined them. During the parade, we hung out with parts of our tramily and got sprayed with water by all of the people standing on the sidelines.
When the parade ended, I felt myself growing upset. Voodoo had turned super extroverted, trying to talk to every single person, showing off that he was a people person. Something about that always bothered me. I guess I just had always envisioned myself with someone really introverted and calm. When I was around people with the same energy level as me or even more intense, I found I would feel unsafe and less grounded.
At one point, he threw his arm around another girl as he was still walking me on the leash. It felt like a huge blow to me. I realized right in that moment how clear it was that I wasn’t interested in feeling like a “side” girl. It was a big ‘no’ in my energy field and I even told him how I’ve never been more turned off by him then in that moment. I felt myself pull away from him energetically, a part of my heart now closed.
Although an exhibitionist, sexual play was a very intimate experience for me. It was my biggest love language, so I needed a lot of attention from my lover in that arena. I needed to be shown consistently that I was his one and only and that he was completely devoted to me, otherwise I would start losing interest fast.
Then, we met up with 700 at the library and basically had a therapy session with him about the status of our relationship. Voodoo went on a rant of his dilemma of feeling like a fool and feeling like all the other guys who fell for my tricks.
“She thinks she’s so slick,” he says.
“She is slick,” 700 corrected.
“She thinks she can just get what she wants,” Voodoo says.
“She can get what she wants,” 700 corrected, “you gotta start changing your word choices, dude.”
I looked at Voodoo seductively. 700 caught me and said how my eyes were dangerous and that the only reason I wanted to meet up with Voodoo in person was so that I could manipulate him with my eyes, which, was actually true.
Mid-argument, I looked at Voodoo and said, “God, he just has so much sex appeal, don’t ya think?”
700 laughed as Voodoo approached me and wrapped my legs around his hips, then started making out with me aggressively, nearly about to fuck me right there.
It seemed Voodoo kept trying to guilt trip me for the way that I was showing up and I kept reminding him, “No one is forcing you to stay or put up with my shit.”
Voodoo looks at 700 and says, “She just fucks me so good. She gives me blowjobs without me asking, she initiates sex, she’s always ready for me.”
The therapy session got absolutely nowhere. It just seemed like a bunch of venting with french kissing in between.
Then, Voodoo and I went to visit the Broken Fiddle. It was a huge party vibe in there. Hikers were cooking up BBQ while Treehouse was in charge of the alcohol bar. The AT in general felt more like a party in the woods compared to trying to survive in the desert or Rocky Mountains. The trail definitely lived up to the reputation of being the “party trail.”
I also found it funny at how often people assumed that Voodoo and I drank alcohol or did drugs, yet it seemed we were the most sober people on trail. Every time we were together, we got offered drugs and alcohol, having to often remind our friends that we didn’t partake. His sobriety was something that I was immensely attracted to.
I asked Treehouse if I could just hang out on his couch and catch my breath because I had been feeling really overwhelmed by all of the people. He said I could take all of the time I needed.
Later, Pusher saw me on the couch and looked at me sternly. He told me that because I didn’t give him twenty minutes of my time to talk to him the other day, it made him feel disrespected and worthless. I was grateful he expressed himself naturally, but as soon as I felt like I wanted to defend myself, I realized there would be no true communication being done between us. I could sense expectations were being made of me and I wasn’t that kind of friend/person to adhere to obligations. I changed my mind often and sporadically and I knew that might be challenging to deal with, but I needed to have the freedom to express in that way. If I didn’t feel like having a talk, then one wasn’t meant to happen. Otherwise, the conversation would feel forced and nothing would come out of it, other than resentment. I didn’t mean to appear cold or standoffish, but I just felt this “over it” kind of energy.
I let him say what he needed to say, then I went back in my zone. Shortly after, I was about to go back outside when Lionheart came inside and shut the door behind him.
He teased, “I read your stuff and I saw what you did by the river, TWICE! I mean, it was like two hours after Treehouse dropped you off. You’re fucking scandalous.”
I laughed my ass off and didn’t even try to deny it. Afterwards, I went outside. Voodoo lifted me up over his shoulders and spun me around, causing both of us to fall over in the grass. He seemed to do it every few hours, no matter where we happened to be. It made me laugh and feel so loved that he wasn’t afraid to show me off the way he did. Believe it or not, I was not used to men openly showing me off.
I went to eat some hot dogs and burgers that were being cooked. Voodoo threw his arm around me, demonstrating to everyone that I was his girl. TheSunGod came up and we greeted each other with a hug.
Then, Lionheart came up and asked him, “Are you a victim, too?”
He shook his head no, while Voodoo said, “I like the pain!”
Lionheart looked over at Pusher sitting alone in the distance and commented, “Oh, poor guy. It’s clear he’s in a lot of pain because of you.”
He pointed out that he was drinking a lot, trying to distract himself from what he was feeling towards me.
I felt extremely standoffish after he said that. I was sick of feeling as if it was my fault that I was putting people in pain. I warned men ahead of time for the way I was as a person before they got too close to me, but when feelings got hurt, it somehow always spun back around on me. Voodoo turned extremely energetic and loud again.
I looked at him and said, “God I just wanna fucking kill you, sometimes.”
“Stab me so I can feel something,” he replied, “you make me hurt so good.”
TheSunGod smiled and goes, “Aweee.”
Although we meant it in a joking way, I realized I didn’t find that type of humor funny anymore. I didn’t want to relate with someone saying words that appeared to be rough around the edges but disguised as love.
Voodoo and I decided to head back to camp. I had a threesome planned with a couple, but honestly, I just wanted to be with Voodoo. He knew how to take care of me sexually and his antics worked to keep me hooked on him.
On our way back to the field, I gave him a sneaky blowjob on the caboose right beside the bridge that people were walking on. It started raining the rest of the night, so we called it early and went back to my tent.
Upon going to bed, Voodoo says to me, “I’ll never give up on you. I’ll never stop loving you.”