Since it was my day off, I took advantage of catching up on sleep for the majority of the day. Then, I decided to go on the loop walk as I still didn’t experience the entirety of it, having gotten distracted by giving blowjobs halfway through. I just started the boardwalk when suddenly I overheard some guys talking and laughing. I saw Kaden’s red sweater through the bushes. I assumed he was with all of the guys I wanted to get with. How perfect that would’ve been to have them all in one spot. But, I felt groggy after having napped so I wasn’t into the idea of being flirty right then. Why did I feel like I had to be? I turned around and went to hang out in the lobby.
There, I saw Dax and asked him if he was going to softball. He said yes however he wanted to grab a beer first.
“You want to sit with me outside?” he asked.
“Yes!”
I joined him out in the sun. It was really sweet and wholesome. I felt really grateful to experience a simple, normal human to human interaction. It was just the kind of connection I was looking for and didn’t even know it.
I told him how I spent a few hours researching the Hayduke trail today and how I felt really inspired to hike it, but that I was scared. I felt the same amount of fear as I did when I first thought about setting out to do the PCT. I planned to start mid-August. I had a full itinerary the next 6-8 months after that, so I wanted to get a head start.
It felt as if it was going to be the most challenging trail for me yet. I found I was fine with long water carries in the desert; what seemed to worry me was not having a good navigation system. That was my biggest challenge because let’s be real, I don’t know how to use a paper map and compass. I understand topography, but I don’t understand it much when there’s not a lot of signs/junctions to work off of.
Dax offered to hike it with me if I would be willing to wait until October. I pondered and figured it would be really nice to have a partner, however it would take a lot of joy/sense of adventure out because I would just be relying on him for navigation. I received a clear inner answer that I needed to trek it alone. The challenge of doing it by myself and figuring it out on my own made it a big ‘yes’ for me. As always, my solitude and excitement for learning something new took center stage.
We grabbed a small crew of lodgies and drove out to the field where people had already started to play softball. The weather was ideal and there were tons more people. Georgina and I began to make sexual innuendos about all of the hot guys there. Dax made it known he was interested in me by breaking the physical barrier, touching my lower back as he shuffled past me. Russ would do the same thing, except he would brush his hand discreetly against my ass.
“Men just flock to you like bugs to a lamp,” Georgina said.
Yeah, but not the ones I want.
All of a sudden, I felt a sense of overwhelm being in that scene. Sensory overload was kicking in quicker the older I seemed to get. I had a deep desire to go walk off alone somewhere. Georgina, tuning into my energy, asked if I wanted to go on a drive.
“Yes!” I exclaimed.
We ditched our gang of ‘kids’ at the field, figuring we wouldn’t be gone for long. Then, we hopped in the van and cruised down some unknown dirt roads. My energy whispered, Thank you, thank you, thank you, over and over again as I reminisced of all the bumpy dirt roads I traversed.
We came across a campground about a mile away from the beach. The sun was in the process of setting, casting a radiant glow upon our windshield. My heart felt full and replenished again. I would’ve stayed if I had my camping gear. After a short moment of soaking up the view, we decided it would be best to head back so they didn’t think we abandoned them.
Upon coming back, everyone had filtered out, so we assumed they must’ve gotten a ride back with someone. On our way back to the lodge, Georgina took a sharp right turn.
“I heard there was a lodge with a restaurant all the way down at the end of the road!” she exclaimed.
I started to doubt it after we drove several minutes without spotting anything. After around 5-6 miles we eventually reached a place called ‘Moose Lane Lodge.’
“This must be it,” she said.
There was a wooden fence with the dirt road continuing to a large cabin lodge. It looked so beautiful from a distance, having the feeling of a warm sanctuary. We didn’t know if we were allowed to enter the premises and it was too late for dinner so we said we would save it for another day. Georgina explored more dirt roads that led to residential areas and reservoirs. It was adorable to find her in such a curious, exploratory mode.
We made it back to Brown Town and saw Russ hanging out on his balcony. They had hitchhiked back.
I yelled, “We’re so sorry!”
“Nuh-uh!” he shot back. “No. Fuck you. Fuck you both! Nope. I don’t want to hear it!”
I didn’t know if he was being jokey, but I just laughed it off, regardless. Before I entered my room, Russ demanded I come upstairs.
I put my head down and in a whiny voice said, “I said I was sorry.”
“Get up. Right now.”
I walked closer and looked up at him with apologetic eyes.
“Up the stairs,” he demanded.
I walked up to the door.
“Get in,” he said.
I walked through then the door shut behind me. There was a chair placed in the middle of the room. Kaden was there, too.
My first thought was, Lucky me! I’m gonna get a lap dance from two black dudes.
Instead they said, “We’re going to play good cop, bad cop.”
Oh, are we role-playing now? Even better.
Let me just say, I was waaay off from my fantasy. It was a full-blown intervention.
Kaden stands over me interrogatively and says, “The entirety of Glacier Bay Lodge knows and is talking about what happened.”
I smiled mischievously.
He continues, “People are saying that we eiffel towered you and that Dylan was there, too. And that you were saying Russ had a better cock.”
“And?” I said, knowing none of it was true.
They both didn’t like that I found it humorous. They began pacing around the room. I laughed even more seeing as they were making a huge deal out of nothing.
Why don’t they just own up to what apparently did happen and brush off the rest?
Kaden was really trying to make me feel bad, saying over and over again that people absolutely cannot know about us, yada yada yada. Throughout my laughter, I was getting equally turned on because I felt as if I was in trouble. I let out a sigh. I saw this moment coming from a mile away. I seem to be the carrier of drama wherever I go, however it doesn’t really feel as if I attach to the stories/outcomes. What’s the point if it’s not even real in the first place? It would be the same as getting upset over something that occurred in a nighttime dream.
Russ tried to further intimidate me by choking me really hard.
“Thank you,” Kaden said to him, but all it did was make me blush and get my legs to spread apart.
I think they received the opposite effect of what they were going for. The whole thing was just doing it for me—two angry black dude standing over me, berating me. I was wondering if their cocks were getting hard for me. I fantasized about the ‘all black men gangbang’ I had scheduled in Virginia that fell through. Is this what it might have started out like? An interrogation? Unfortunately, nothing came out of it with Kaden and Russ. They ended up kicking me out and I left the room feeling intensely aroused.
“Don’t be smiling when you walk out of the room!” Russ yelled, “Goddamnit, that just gives off the wrong impression again.”